Aug 21 2011
SUPERMARKET SHUFFLE
Greeting, Cool Peeps:
Today we’re going to the supermarket. Although we all shop in different stores around the globe, I’m betting we have some of the same peeves. And I’ve no doubt that you, my awesome readers, will have your own delightful peeves to share.
Last night I worked late. I was exhausted, but I was out of everything and anything one can be out of: a trip to the supermarket was inevitable. All I wanted was to run in the store, grab some cat food for Captain Jack and go quickly through my list with no pain. That’s when I saw the sign implying that all products in the store had been rearranged for “the customers’ convenience.” Are you freakin’ kidding me? I had finally memorized the location of almost everything in the store from the last time they shuffled the goods for “the customers’ convenience” and now, once again, I was forced to play undercover detective and search high and low for every last item I needed. Why do they do that? I’d like to go into the homes and offices of the executives who make these decisions, switch everything around when they’re not looking, and see how convenient that is!
I’ll tell you something else I learned, and it isn’t pretty. One day, I saw this woman shopping. I watched as she reached into several bins at the salad bar and picked out things like olives, cherry tomatoes, sliced cucumbers, and cheese cubes, as if they were party hors d’oeuvres. It didn’t seem to faze her that she was touching food that other peeps would be eating. When I mentioned this to my friend who works in the produce department, she told me that the employees had been instructed not to say a word to the loyal customers for fear of upsetting them or losing their business. But nobody seemed to care if they were contaminating food for other “loyal customers.” Yet, if an employee were to catch someone down on their luck doing the same thing, it was okay to have said person physically removed from the store. That’s not right. Nobody should be touching the food. And this is why I’m not keen on salad bars. Or some store policies.
How many of you use the self-checkout? It’s supposed to be quicker, but every time I have tried it, this woman’s voice (the sister of the she-devil in my GPS) tells me that I need to scan some item I’ve already scanned (as if I’m stealing it), or a perishable item is not labeled with a code for weighing, the machine won’t accept my card, and on and on. Why do they call it self-checkout when invariably you have to call the attendant to help you through the muddled mess? Yeah, I know, lots of peeps go through self-checkout with no problems. Yours truly isn’t one of them.
Now, let me just say a few words about the customers. Peeps, please do the world a favor: stay with your freakin’ cart! Do not block aisle 6 with your cart while you run over to aisle 11 for some paper towels, bump into your neighbor, and stand there and discuss your other neighbors. Remember, there are peeps back in aisle 6 (and I’m likely one of them) trying to get by.
While I’d love to rant on, I’m saving space for a huge pet peeves: peeps who do not return their carts leaving them to block parking spaces or roll into someone’s car. This just incenses me! I’m very sure that the shoppers who leave their carts where they can damage another car are the ones who scream the loudest when their cars are damaged.
I’m out of space, though I’ve got lots more to say. So I’m counting on you, cool peeps, to carry on with the writing of this blog. I know you’ve got lots of stories, gripes, wishes, and dishes to share. I’m going to sit back now and let you entertain me. You always do!
See you next week.
Yours in pickiness,
Molly