May 29 2011
Greetings, Cool Peeps:
You know, there isn’t a day that goes by when I don’t think about how technology has vastly changed the way we do everything. I won’t even try to give a brief mention to everything (both positive and negative) that has come from a recent technological advance. So, I just have one question: with all of the “stuff” that has been invented, why hasn’t someone figured out how to make a rewind button?
Do you know how many miserable situations could just be avoided if we could hit REWIND and go back even five seconds in time – even two? Think about the car accidents alone that could be avoided. Now that would be amazing.
But I don’t want to get too heady here. I’m just thinking about my life and about all the times when just a five-second rewind would go a really long way.
Even if you haven’t done it yourself, most of us know someone who has chatted up either a female acquaintance or stranger with the words, “So, when is your baby due?” only to receive the mortifying response, “I’m not pregnant.” Those are the moments when you either want the universe to zap you into oblivion or the ground to swallow you whole.
A friend of mine, Dina, recently ran into a former co-worker, Caleb, on the street. She smiled at the woman by his side and pleasantly said, “It’s a pleasure to meet you. I’ve heard so much about you.”
Caleb tried to say, “I don’t think that’s possible,” but Dina enthusiastically babbled on to stranger. “Oh, but Caleb used to talk about his mom all the time. He said Mother’s Day was invented just for you. And that you make the best cherry pie ever.”
And then the earth fell silent. The woman shot rays of poison at Dina and Caleb atrophied where he stood. Finally, just as the Tin Man managed to mumble “Oil Can” in the “Wizard of Oz,” Caleb mumbled, “This is my wife, Sarah, Dina.” Is that not a total duh-you-moron-rewind moment?
TV and radio shows have seven-second delays for a reason. People, including yours truly, make mistakes.
One of the worst rewind moments ever is sending an email to the wrong person. Have you ever gotten an email which you didn’t realize was sent to multiple recipients, and without realizing it, you send a personal response to everyone? That is horrific. But it gets worse.
Once, I was in a situation where I needed to warn a friend about a recent former friend who had just stabbed me in the back. Because I was still fuming over the betrayal, I chose the backstabber’s name, and not the name of my current friend, from my email list. The MOMENT I hit “Send,” that horrific, paralyzing, sinking feeling of dread overwhelmed my senses. “ARE YOU FREAKIN’ kidding me?” I screamed to the universe. I suffered for two days, waiting for payback.
A week later, I ran into the backstabber on the street. She looked right at me and said, “Molly, I deleted your email. I have no interest in any apologies you make to me.”
Normally, I would have read her the riot act, and been very clear that no apologies were ever made to someone who had done wrong to me. (Tried to steal my boyfriend!) But I didn’t care. I had been saved.
There are all kinds of rewind moments. When I kindly hold a door open for someone who does not acknowledge me, or let someone in traffic who does not wave thanks, I often wish I could rewind and take back my kindness. But then again, I wonder. Isn’t it a better world when we put our best out there, whether or not the kindness is returned?
What about you, cool peeps? How often do you wish your life had a rewind button?
See you next week.
Yours in pickiness,